I'm not ashamed to admit that this morning I finally emerged from the fog named Video Game Reality Distortion. In case you live in the real world and actually spend your time being healthy and productive, yesterday was the launch date of the Nintendo DS Lite. Because I clearly don't have enough going on, it seemed like a really good idea to get this beautiful new handheld gaming system that looks like the old DS has been getting busy with iPods ... and then convince my friends to do likewise so we can all sit around with me wirelessly kicking their asses all over MarioKart. Super Mario Bros., The Sims 2, MarioKart, and a Tetris later, and I'm officially *that person* who is 28 and spends her time in coffee houses wirelessly kicking MarioKart ASS! while young, 23 year old graduate students sip their coffee and continue in their studious attempts to make a difference in a world full of burnouts like me.
In my few hours at The Spyhouse coffee shop I may not have cured world hunger but I did learn that:
A) Peach sucks serious MarioKart DS ass. Peach is pink, so *of course* I race with her... but after getting my ass creamed by Donkey Kong, Wario, Bowser, and every other piece of testosterone flying around on the track all drunk with power I did what any smart MarioKart player does - I traded her whiney ass in for some bog-standard Yoshi hotness. \m/
B) 2 large vanilla lattes really does mean I won't get to sleep until 1:30 am.
C) Nintendo DS Lite hotness is the envy of dreary-eyed, studious graduate students parking themselves at coffeehouses and diligently working their way towards making a difference in a world full of burnouts like me.
D) Black shorts, green & black spotted leggings, and black boots work surprisingly well together.
E) I will always and forever remain the undisputed World Champion of MarioKart. Always. And forever.
Buying the DS Lite was a trip. Not only did my DS Lite grace the bottom of my basket, but I also picked up one for a friend along with 4 games. All the little 9 year old boys in the gaming isle were so-ho-ho-ho pea green with eye bulging envy. Ha ha ha pwnd bitches!!!
Comments
I often enjoy this blog without commenting. But this is just too much.
I would bet upwards of $20 that I would handidly defeat you at MarioKart. You may be good, but beating up on the JV MarioKart squad is nothing to brag about.
Although I prefer the modded XBox, if you or someone else has an DS lite to loan, you're in trouble.
You may not have solved world hunger, but I bought a Timbuk2 bag per your recommendation, and I am smitten. So you saved me the hassle of lugging around a crap/uncool bag, oh yeah. Thanks!
I'll take that bet Taylor. But make sure you bring some tissues for when you cry.
Excellent news James! What kind of Timbuk2 did you get - and more importantly - what COLORS?!!!
(homer voice) Neeeerd! (/homer voice)
Alright, Miss Doesn't Have Any Idea What Sort of Ubearable MarioKart Ass Whippin' Awaits Her, I'm going to throw a MarioKart tournament with the finest MarioKart players the Twin Cities have to offer. You better hope that the bracket doesn't lead you to me!!!!
As someone who has been humiliated playing video games with Margaret many times before I can say without qualification: be careful what you wish for.
I haven't so much as glanced at a console in years, the defeat was so bad.
Um, so the ONLY thing you've been doing is playing video games, huh??
Hmm. So, ALL weekend??? It must be really time consuming being a new mom and having a new .... "game." That totally explains the lack of posting over your weekends. Hee hee hee ;))
XOXO Smooches!
Okay, MariaKart match, Friday night, Psycho Suzi's.
Nerd Alert.
Done and done. If someone could bring their DS Lite for me to borrow, that would be awesome. If not, we can compete against the just hand of the MarioClock.
I got the medium-sized messenger bag in gray and black, black like my soul, mwa ha ha ha!
Thanks for the recommendation -- now I can go plunder the business world in style.