Hiya! Roger here (otherwise known as jellywellington), subbing for Margaret again whilst she’s having her long weekend away. I would have posted yesterday, but I totally forgot to send the password details for sopheava to my home email so it all went horribly wrong! I’m just so scatter-brained and unreliable – probably the last person Margaret should trust to look after the place when she’s not around, but there you go! Way-hey! I mean, I don’t even know how to pronounce the name of the site – is it pronounced ‘so-fever’? ‘sopp-hevver’? ‘so-feearrva’? I dunno. Someone enlighten me. It says on the site somewhere, I know, but I’ve got this huge deadline and it’s nearly lunch and I’m hungry and stuff (note tummy rumble, just off screen). She’s told me before, like probably a million times, but it just goes straight in one ear and out of the other one again.
Do any of you have even the slightest clue who I am and what I look like? (Do you even care? Nobody cares! waaaah!) I must be the only regular contrubuter to this blog who has never, ever, ever (ever!) had my gorgeous face featured in Lumiere. So I don’t live in Minneapolis! Is it still too much to ask for Margaret to come and take a snazzy photo of me doing something interesting? I do interesting things all the time. No, really! My life is one long series of fabulously interesting things that even the most cynical photo-journalist couldn’t fail to find fascinating. Only this morning I ate a bag of crisps while sat at my desk. See! If I don’t get my photo in Lumiere soon I’m just gonna burst, I tell you!
So yes, Roger: English, 5’10", slim, wears a lot of black, scruffy brown hair (what’s left of it), rather dashing and handsome if I say so meself, rarely clean shaven, graphic designer, yadda yadda yadda.
Hey! Stop drifting off at the back there! Pay attention damn it!
We need to seriously impact on the stats while Margaret is away, as she’s SO jealous that apparently whenever I cover for her, the stats go up, which means that I’m WAY more popular than she is, as well as being dashing and handsome. So here’s the thing. I’m gonna cheat and let’s hope she doesn’t notice – everyone who reads this : when you leave for another site, pop back here again briefly, then go somewhere else, then pop back here a third time – all you need to do is just nip in, then straight back out again. That should do it. If you ALL do this, I’ll get three times as many hits as she usually gets, and she’ll be green with envy and stomping her feet and she’ll never guess what’s happened! Ha ha!!
er.. unless she sees this post, that is….
More rubbish tomorrow. Funnier, too. No, really, it will be!
Roger x