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In which I talk about lattes... again!

In my random state of alcohol induced genius the other night, no I didn't write about why it's a bad idea to microwave a Starbucks latte at 8 in the morning and no I didn't write about how to get free oil changes, but I DID! deduce that we (the human race) have been collectively spelling a vast array of words the wrong way (this revelation merely scratches the surface of my never-ending supply of genius). Therefore "womb" shall henceforth be represented as "woom". "Tomb" is now "toom". And "comb" is now "coam".

Agreed? Agreed.

(Back off Oxford University Press, you can't afford me.)

Busy, busy girl this weekend. I finally figured out the trick to unpacking (which if you've been paying attention know I hate about as much as people who chew with their mouths open): it's all a matter of *annoying* yourself in to a state of unpacking submission. See I strategically placed the suitcase 5 feet from my front door, but more importantly directly in the path to the living room. And sure enough! By Friday I was so annoyed with (tripping over) myself I unpacked the stupid thing. Believe me, it takes years to develop and achieve such a sophisticated web of thought processes. But I can be bought (yeah, a latte will do it) and am happy to consult with you and your lingering problems in any way I can.

I also cleaned, vacuumed, did 8 loads of laundry, filed my taxes, somehow ended up a flickr babe (again!), finished 2 novels, got 300 pages in to 'The Historian' by Elizabeth Kostova, updated a, um, thing I can't talk about in case the people who pay my rent read this, updated 3 websites, shot some photographs, cured world hunger, had a nice little chat with my best friend's boyfriend (er, I guess he's now her ex-boyfriend... again) in which I managed to insult him with the phrase "What do you think?", drank a non-microwaved latte, and discovered 5 bruises on my legs. Yeeeeeah, I'm not so sure about that last one cuz seriously... what the fuck? I'm a computer nerd who literally spends all her time in front of a computer and not so much out climbing mountains. What a curious life my sleepwalking self must lead.

Now that we've got all that stuff out of the way, let's clear up a few other minor details:

• I work in St. Louis Park.
• But I live in downtown Minneapolis.
• So if you want to meet up with me over lunch make sure you remember that minor detail unless you want to be having lunch with Steve (but he's not nearly as nice to look at).
• It is, in fact, possible to get almost anything for free... including oil changes.
• Where did pop music go to die? That would be my computer in case anyone's on the hunt.
• I am the Rummy 500 M.A.S.T.E.R. Bitches step off.
• The current design's artwork? I leveraged elements from Kirsten Ulve's stuff. Gotta love her.
• Always make sure the dolts at Starbucks actually remembered to *heat* your latte before you drive off with a cup of cold milk and espresso in your hands.
• Additionally, milk expands when heated... just keep that in mind when you're re-heating your latte at 8 in the morning and step away from the microwave for a few minutes. In the event you do walk away, return with a generous helping of paper towels and/or napkins.
• Milk also has a tendency to burn around the edges if left unattended. Another minor detail that often slips through the cracks.