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Pull up a couch and let it all out

I'm probably going to live to regret saying this on my website, but here it goes.

I have this theory that if something scares the living beejeesies out of you, you should probably do it. The veil of fear is a heavy, stupid thing that gives us wrinkles and ulcers for no tangible reason. I mean really. What are some of the things you're most afraid of and why do you let them do that 'fear' thing to you? What do you get out of it? Fears can be big things - like fear of being alone, fear of being unloved - or they can be small things - like a fear of snakes (yes well, this one doesn't actually impede on my everyday life but only when I'm at the zoo or trekking through the jungle, neither of which happens very often so let's just let me have this one, m'kay?, great, thanks). Either way, fears are fears and I believe they come to you for a reason.

So you can *DO* something about them!

This week I started getting that tight, panicky feeling in my chest because it's T minus 5 days until I start writing my novel and...

1. I still have no plot


2. I still have no characters


3. I still have no ideas


4. no storyline either


5. I still haven't checked myself in to a local mental institution and beds must be filling up quickly

Which of course means I know I'm doing the right thing with this whole novel bullshit. I might be crazy but at least I have a good reason for being so.

Last night, oh sweet Tuesday, October 25th evening, last night I had a moment of clarity whilst chatting with a friend. Yes people, the idea gods saw fit to bestow upon this lowly mortal a single idea. A beautiful, wonderful, glorious jumping off point that's going to get me started on this long road to hell being a novelist by December 1st. And more importantly, it's done more to ease the tightness in my chest than all the Robitussen I od'd on this week. Not only doesn't it seem like such a bad idea to write this book next month anymore, it's starting to seem *dare I say it out loud* like a GOOD idea! What the hell else was I going to do with my 2005 November anyway? Um, yeah. Probably nothing significant.

So here's what I got so far...

• a heroine


• someone named Launch (yes well, she's been stalking me the past few days - like *I* would give her a stupid name like Launch!)


• Markus with a 'k' (he's foreign and yuuuuuuuuumy!)


• a job (or lack thereof)


• an airplane


• a camera

Yes I know it's a light start but that's all I needed. A start.

Fears people. Embrace them, love them, kick the living shit out of them, and punch them in their beady little faces.

What are you doing with your November? Giving fear the bird?