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Beware of the fool's

Watch out for April Fool's... they're EVERWHERE! Actually, I think it's safe to generally extend that to 'Any-Kind-Of' Fool.

So instead of dwelling on the looming craziness that will be today, I'd like to take a brief moment to list my first favorite thing for April...

Let me set the stage by describing my bedroom for you. Beautiful art on the walls (Gustav Klimt's 'The Kiss', Doisneau's 'The Kiss', and chinese calligraphy on stone tiles above my bed), minimalistic, zen, smells like vanilla most of the time, big squishy bed with lots of pillows, a bay window with three luscious plants, and lots of candles.

Spring is coming, the earth is tilting, and the sun is starting to rise at that spot it loves so much directly in my line of morning vision. You know, the one where I'm sleeping soundly and am awoken by bright, beautiful sunlight pouring in my room. Right on my eyes. I probably *should* be mad, but I freagin' LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!

So that's what I'm doing this morning (and every other morning this week) before 7 am. Windows wide open, sitting (or in this case laying) in bed, looking out my windows with a huge smile on my face.

Just thought I would share.

Mmmmmmmore Mmmmmarkus

Big news today... Markus (with a 'k') has made another appearance. An appearance and a half even.

Whoa.

Even Em had to bow down to his magnificence. All hail magnificence.

And he stared at me. Of course, I wasn't wearing my glasses but I could tell. There was definite stare-ation.

Two sightings within 3 weeks. Let's review the facts:

1) First occurence was 15 March 2004. He stood in line at Subway (3rd and 2nd). I gawked from afar. Why, why, why didn't I get Subway that day is what I would like to know.

2) Second occurence - TODAY! This time in the skyway above Marquette and 7th.

3) I'm fairly certain the first Markus was from Greece. Not to be confused with today's Markus, from Italy. Both decendents of the Yummy-Mc-Yums-A-Lot clan.

I'm just going to log off now - having trouble piecing together whole sentences and paragraphs.

A Sopheava Friday

I'm a sap tonight. Here is my perfect Friday evening (which by no means of coincidence happens to be tonight!):

A) Come home from work and take a nap
A.1) In a queen size bed
A.2) With a fluffy, soft, squishy, clean, perfectly textured and inviting down comforter
A.3) The bed has four pillows, all for me!
A.4) The sheets and pillowcases are a delectable color scheme of creme and green
B) Get to lay in bed for as long as I want, looking out my window at the gorgeous Minneapolis skyline - it's intoxicating
B.1) Especially at night
C) Loll out of bed and take a shower
C.1) I can't get over the pink shampoo and conditioner I use - I swear to goddess my hair is cleaner and smells nicer because of it; I am Neutrogena's pink-shampoo lovin' slut
C.2) I am also Victoria's Secret's garden collection of scents' slut; tonight's flavor is 'Passionate Kisses'; it's purple
D) Wrap myself in a soft cotton floor length green robe (again, the shade is so gorgeous there are no words)
E) Throw my hair up
F) Light vanilla scented candles, tea lights, nag champa a smidgen, and fire up the blue glitter lava lamp (don't let the picture fool you - my room looks like it's underwater when the light does that thing it does)

And there you have it - all the ingredients to a perfect night in. And NOW for the sappiness - haw haw.

There's a song by Annie Lennox called "A Thousand Beautiful Things" that makes me so happy I want to cry! And I can't stop listening to it. Like, hello, it's amazing!

The lyrics are probably about a man and woman, but to me they're about the light in every person's soul and the universe. Oh my gawd, I'm getting a little verklempt just thinking about it. Here are the lyrics, talk amongst yourselves.

Every day I write the list
Of reasons why I still believe they do exist
(a thousand beautiful things)
And even though it's hard to see
The glass is full and not half empty
(a thousand beautiful things)
So... light me up like the sun
To cool down with your rain
I never want to close my eyes again
Never close my eyes
Never close my eyes

I thank you for the air to breathe
The heart to beat
The eyes to see again
(a thousand beautiful things)
And all the things that's been and done
The battle's won
The good and bad in everyone
(this is mine to remember)
So ...
Here I go again
Singin' by your window
Pickin' up the pieces of what's left to find

The world was meant for you and me
To figure out our destiny
(a thousand beautiful things)
To live
To die
To breathe
To sleep
To try to make your life complete
(yes yes)
So ...
Light me up like the sun
To cool down with your rain
I never want to close my eyes again
Never close my eyes
never close my eyes ...
That is everything I have to say
(that's all I have to say)

I am nerd, see me blog

Recap of my weekend:

building a new website.

So.... um, how about them Yankee's? I hear they have A-rod this year. Woot.

Seriously, my ENTIRE weekend has been spent in working on this new website. Not finished, but will post it here first thing when it's through. I am *officially* the definition of a 'nerdling.'

Sopheava's Definition of a Nerdling: He/She who spends entire weekends at the computer designing, coding, and implementing. Also does not sleep well due mainly to the fact that unfinished code taunts like a harlot at a brothel. Couch, chair, or comfy diaphram-resembling piece of purple furniture of the velvety variety has imprint of ass. (Go on, stand up for a second and look... it's there). Nerdlings description of 'taking a break' from the hell that is coding consists of:

• getting food


• taking a shower


• IMing with fellow nerdlings


• blogging

HEY! Wait a second!....

In other news, my right forearm itches. I mean, who has an itchy right forearm? *raises left arm only for a moment, then has to scratch right forearm* This calls for a bath... more to come from this chica later this week.

PS
I expect Keira and Steve to STEP FORWARD as fellow nerdlings: Steve of the 'writing only in my head' variety. Oh, and the iTunes music list on blog variety too. Keira of the "[OleDbException (0x80040e07): Data type mismatch in criteria expression.] System.Data.OleDb.OleDbCommand.ExecuteCommandTextErrorHandling(Int32 hr) +41 System.Data.OleDb.OleDbCommand.ExecuteCommandTextForSingleResult(tagDBPARAMS dbParams, Object& executeResult) +122 System.Data.OleDb.OleDbCommand.ExecuteCommandText(Object& executeResult) +92 System.Data.OleDb.OleDbCommand.ExecuteCommand(CommandBehavior behavior, Object& executeResult) +65 System.Data.OleDb.OleDbCommand.ExecuteReaderInternal(CommandBehavior behavior, String method) +112 System.Data.OleDb.OleDbCommand.ExecuteReader(CommandBehavior behavior) +69 System.Data.OleDb.OleDbCommand.System.Data.IDbCommand.ExecuteReader(CommandBehavior behavior) +5 System.Data.Common.DbDataAdapter.FillFromCommand(Object Source Error: Line 18: MyAdapter.SelectCommand = MyCommand Line 19: DS = New DataSet() Line 20: MyAdapter.Fill(DS) Line 21: Line 22: DataList1.DataSource = DS" flavor.

Today's topic: the weather

I know, it's very boring to read about the weather. But it's my blog, dammit, and I can write about it if I want to!

First things first. The sun is completely fucking with my internal clock. Now when I say 'fucking', I mean that in the most literal sense of the word. I'm quite enjoying this little rendezvous thing we got goin' on every morning at 6am. Why does it make me so fucking happy - I don't know. I almost make myself wanna throw up. And of course, my plants like it too (don't ask).

Second. It (keeping with our theme here) climaxed at 71 degrees today. SEVENTY ONE! Bring in the emergency squads cuz I might have an toe-mergency on my hands. It has officially been since... um...er, well... I hate to say it, but eight months since I've had my last pedicure. Good god, sandal season is almost upon us and I need to be prepared. *making mental note to self to quit being such a nerdling and to start being even *more* of a prima donna - that's right, I'm in IT now so I can officially call myself a 'prima donna'*

Third. What's third?

Winter - SEE YA! Don't let the door hit your big ass on the way out! Its been miserable while it lasted. Aurevoir. Ciao.

Now... if those geniuses at the computer companies could figure out a way for me to take my wireless laptop to the park or the greenway THEN I might be in business!

What is in a name?

Today we have a guest blogger: Keira. Her entry for today - 'What's In a Name?' (and as an FYI, I would have posted my own suggestions by now but the martini I just drank begs to differ... let's just say I'm *fairly certain* that I will be naming mine "Shiva").

Heed the calling

Sometimes I get the urge to do this.

(it's 4:40 in the morning right now - I want to shove all my loud neighbors... all of them)

Diary of an amateur driver

I bet everyone is wondering what Margaret did today. The 411...

• Walked around downtown to the tune of Joe and Steve humming, not silently, "Mmmmm.... hot dog vendors are out... mmmmm..." Stopped at my main music dealer and got a fix: Alicia Keys - Diary of Alicia Keys.

  What do I think? Let me be honest with you (does anyone cringe when I say that yet?)...

  I downloaded some of the tunes from this album right after it came out. My thoughts then? Blah. Fine. Whateverrrr. Nothing to get excited about, definitely should not buy it. Ooooh look, there's bright shiny stuff over there! *excitedly runs towards bright shiny things*

  Today I was weak. Today I needed stimulation (ok, so I need stimulation everyday). It seems a well-documented fact (and rather hysterical ongoing joke) amongst the people in my circle that I have an abnormally high stimulation level. We're talking "the art on my computer changes more than once a day", "my MP3 playlist is consistently around 2000 songs, rotates daily, and I still get bored with it", and "I taught myself CSS in one weekend cuz I was bored." Ha ha, very funny... but true. Thus, the Alicia album. Bring it on Alicia - entertain me.

  And holy hay-suess, did she deliver! My IT department is what the french call le extreme programming environmente, where headphones are strictly forbidden. I, however, am indisputably cute so I get away with it (and a LOT of other things... hee hee). To be courteous I usually keep the volume pretty low so I can still hear what's going on around me. Not today. Today was about Alicia. "Oooh baby, if there's anything that you fear..." Ok, I'm starting to repeat myself so I'm on to another subject. Hey look, bright shiny things at bullet #2!



• Said IT department decided to have a little exercise in bonding this afternoon. I put up my argument, made it well known I thought it was shitty that IT got to leave during the middle of a huge software release and leave everyone else fixing their problems, but was *still* forced to go. Literally forced. Said bonding exercise?: Go-karting.

  Even moral objections couldn't keep me from having a great time. Woot! I'll post some pictures tomorrow if I can get my little paws on them. Here's what I learned:

  -- The CTO is CTO for a reason: he drove me in to the wall so hard that I my left wheel went under the barriers and glasses nearly flew off. Yup. Here's what I saw: a lot of smoke, the flying of rubber, and a whoosh of 6 people go SAILING by me. It took TWO men to get me out. Two! Was he threatened by my stunning driving? Definitely. Was he intimidated by my go-karting presence? Always. Was he trembling in his little booties knowing of certain defeat and failure? Goes without saying. All I can say is that it sucks to be him tomorrow - his desk is RIGHT next to mine. He will pay for that little stunt. Oh yes, he will pay.

  -- Watch out for the quiet ones... the quietest fellow of the group, Pusit, got so upset at someone going slow in front of him that I watched Pusit rear end the fellow. Not once. Not twice. Not even three times. But FOUR times! Crazy mo-fo. Words of advice, keep the quiet ones away from go-karts.

  -- The guy who brings along driving gloves drives like Bowser in Mario Kart. The gloves are purely show, he *will* be the slowest one.

  -- And finally, be careful who drives you home after go-karting. Dave nearly rear ended us... a few times... as he wanted to gently *bump* the car in front of us in a lesson of the 'get out of my way or I'm sticking your ass in the wall' variety. Fo shizzle, yo.



• A little clarification on yesterday's post. I did decide on a name for le beloved computer (again, french): Shiva (not french, but Hindu and lovely).
  "He is both static and dynamic and is both creator and destroyer. He is the oldest and the youngest, he is the eternal youth as well as the infant. He is the source of fertility in all living beings. He has gentle as well as fierce forms. Shiva is the greatest of renouncers as well as the ideal lover. He destroyes evil and protects good. He bestows prosperity on worshipers although he is austere. He is omnipresent and resides in everyone as pure consciousness."

  Why did I pick this name? I leave that to your capable interpretation.

That said, I'm all out of boring things to blog about tonight. Really, I have GOT to come up with some new material... aren't you guys getting bored lately? For hay-suess's sake, I am nearly putting myself to sleep here. *Making mental note to self that tonight's homework assignment is to come up with something highly contraversial and/or entertaining for tomorrow...*

How would I look if I were held together by lead?

Steve posted this amazing link tonight that allows you to create your own caricature.

Novel idea.

And now, I present to you my caricature. I shall call her, "Margaret."

|-- Click to embiggen --|

Another one of those survey thingies - hu huh, I said 'thingy'

WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? Margaret Elizabeth

BIRTHDAY? 21st of October

LIVING ARRANGEMENT? Yes, I live, thank you very much

WHAT BOOK(s) ARE YOU READING NOW? 'Pantone Guide to Color', 'Making and Breaking the Grid: Graphic Design', 'Restaurant at the End of the Universe'

WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? you would think a graphic designer would have a very cool answer for this - something on the cutting edge of technology? no. A gorgeous piece of art? no. I, er, actually do not have a mousepad. At work I use a leather one my father gave me as a present.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE BOARD GAME? Pay Day (still giving Cranium a shot)

BABIES? Ok, heed these words and heed them well. I only like the sound of this word if it's coming from my lover's mouth as he affectionately calls me this pet name. For example, "Ah baby, you look FINE today!" or "Baby, here's the credit card"

FAVORITE SOUNDS? little birdies, almost anything coming out of my MP3 player, purr of a kitten (and the purr of something else, if you know what I mean)

HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE? I would have an answer for you if I ever kept my phone turned on... go away

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST? rarely drive anymore these days (my car thinks I broke up with it we see each other so little), but when I do - yes - there is no dawdling

DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? nope

STORMS, COOL OR SCARY? Let's be honest - the first 20 times I filled out this survey this question was cool... but I have NEVER read someone's responses and seen a 'scary' in place. Personally, this question should die a painful questionnaire death in the pits of fiery hell!!!!!!! Tea, anyone?

WHAT TYPE WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? 1992 Olds Cutlass Calais - Maroon

FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK? Currently of the 'Screaming Blue Mimi' Martini variety

DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI? who doesn't? "x-tra butter on that one if you please"

IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR WHAT WOULD IT BE? platinum blonde

EVER BEEN IN LOVE? I always love - there's no falling out of love with myself and the infinite beauty of the universe (quick, call the SAP police - we have a live one on our hands!!!!!)

IS THE GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL? well this all depends on the situation - If I'm drinking out of it then it's half empty. If I'm pouring myself a new drink and it gets to that point then it's half-full

FAVORITE MOVIES? jesus christ my head hurts from making all these decisions, I feel like a broken record. No favorite movies, but a few I watch regularly include... eh, I'll get back to you on that one after I check my DVD collection

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? mounting board (huh huh, I just said 'mount'), books I'm currently reading

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? 36

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH? ballet - anyone who wishes to battle it out with me on whether ballet is really a sport will get their asses served to them on a silver platter

WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? the sweet sounds of nerdling developers behind me clicking away at their keyboards

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? consumed: green tea (in progress); ate: pizza

HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW? brilliant - and I should know, I have the sweetest desk in the entire company right in front of the windows :-)

LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? good goddess its been so long since I've talked to anyone on the phone I don't even remember. Keira maybe?

THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX? who the fuck are we kidding - I notice their body. Shallow, order for one. Check please.

HOW ARE YOU TODAY? since you asked.... I just got my period and I'm slightly bitter about. Hey guys, let me come over so I can give you a HUGE, GAPING open wound. And THEN I'm going to *keep* that miserable wound open for 7 days so I can watch it bleed profusely. Additionally, I'm going to come over and do it EVERY SINGLE MONTH for about 30 years. Kosher? Don't tell me not to be a bitch about it, I'm upset, and I'm allowed to be.

HAIR COLOR? Depends on the light... sandy brown? sandy blonde? blah blah - anyone bored yet?

EYE COLOR? (broken record) depends on the light... blue... grey.. hazel... for real, my eyes are all those colors

SIBLINGS AND THEIR AGES? does anyone REALLY care? We have Damien: 8,666,666 years old, Lucifer: slightly older than Damien, touchy about giving out exact numbers, Satan: the big boy of the group and my idol

LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Honey (I got teary eyed at the end)

ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT? ha ha ha, ho ho, hee hee - have we met?

SUMMER OR WINTER? spring and fall, deal with it

WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT? well, I verbally assaulted several nuns before baking a cake. Then I posted several porn picture of myself and immediately cured world hunger after I was finished.

FAVORITE SMELLS? vanilla, cologne (all the fellas in the house, take note: women LOVE cologne - if you wear cologne, you'll likely get laid)

CAN YOU TOUCH YOUR NOSE WITH YOUR TONGUE? do you think I would be single if I could?

WHAT INSPIRES YOU? energy

CAN YOU JUGGLE? Depends what you're asking me to juggle - nyuk nyuk

RED OR WHITE WINE? wine doesn't do it for me, so when I drink wine it mainly depends on which color goes with what I'm wearing

DONOR CARD? never

IF YOU COULD ONLY KEEP ONE OF YOUR SENSES, WHICH WOULD IT BE? sound

OPTIMIST OR PESSIMIST? depends who's judging me

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING? Is the sun shining?

FUTURE CHILD'S NAME? 'Hey you, get back in that closet' has a nice ring, no? Kidding. KIDDING!

HOW MANY DIFFERENT CITIES/TOWNS HAVE YOU LIVED IN? a lot... *scratches chin* um... 10 I think?

TOILET PAPER/PAPER TOWEL-OVER OR UNDER? -- OVER OVER OVER -- mutha fucka... never, ever put it under

MORNING PERSON, OR NIGHT OWL? all the little birdies and I are morning chicks, er, birds

Oops, my head was in a thick cloud of smoke

How did I not blog yesterday?

I make a point of blogging nearly everyday and somehow I went to sleep yesterday full convinced I had.

WTF?

Excuse me for a few hours while I attempt to get my head out of my ass...

Spring cleaning, no really

Today was a huge day. HUGE. The behemoth of days.

First things first, I present A BRAND NEW SKIN! Every time I release a new skin I think to myself, "This one is gorgeous. Everyone is going to love it!" But it turns out the reaction I usually get is, "Eh." So ya'll can suck it. I *love* the new skin, think it's gorgeous and fun, and you're just gonna have to deal with it. Reminds me far too much of me, my city, and my swanky pad. *giggles uncontrollably and does happy running-man dance*

That's the most exciting thing I got for ya tonight. Here's a brief rundown of the rest of my day...

• woke up by 7:30am


• cleaned and sorted everything - led to throwing out tons of c.r.a.p.


• vacuumed and dusted everything in site


• sent wash machine in to overdrive


• since it's easter weekend and I'm spending it alone, I decided to order some Big Bowl and let myself feast - so I did! Mmmmmm.... big bowl.... kung pao chicken.... noodles... potstickers...


• I napped


• Oh, and I watched "Ghost" whiled I made the new skin (Demi and Patrick STILL make me cry every time I see it)

Ok, so it doesn't actually seem like I got a lot done now that I look at my list but I DID! Just cleaning, sorting, washing, and vacuuming took up about 6 hours of my day. I am now sitting in a perfectly cleaned, organized, vanilla scented, lovely, gorgeous, candlelit room that makes me perfectly calm and at ease.

Will finish watching "Titanic" and it's off to bed for me. 'Night ya'll.

Happy Easter

~~Love, Margaret

Peeptastic Easter

It's Easter, so what do you think I did? What every girl does on Easter Sunday: paints her toenails and fingernails, right? In pink of course (homage). All whilst stuffing chocolate covered peanut butter in my mouth. To the tune of some completely ridiculous music in the background: let's make it Britney Spears to complete the picture. There's something about pink nails that makes me feel... oh, what's the word... girlie. And I'm lovin' it!

Someone else bathed in pink today *cough Keira cough*. I am very proud of my girl - she skinned her blog today! Now... I'm officially still not allowed to give out the address since A) the skinning is not complete, B) her mouth is even raunchier than mine, and C) she's a drug lord in the witness protection programme. Instead you'll have to click here for a teaser.

*And if you think about ratting my girl out on that drug lord thing, her ill-tempered crew will send you in to a sugary coma!. Don't let the blue fool you. They're mean-spirited, ill-tempered, deadly ASS-assins. Armed with highly lethal ammunition, specifically designed to appeal to every man's and woman's strongest desires.*

Alright, alright, alright already. I'm starting to get a little carried away on the peep thing. Almost like I was part of a peep-mafia or something!

I kid, I kid.

It's approaching my bedtime so I'll have to bid everyone adieu (plus I'm running out of peep jokes). Happy Easter everyone.

mDogg in the hizouse

Few of you know that in college I frequently answered to the nick 'mDogg.' AKA Mags, Marge, Margie, Maggan, Maggie, Hey-You-Get-Off-That-Table, Madge, Maddie, Margarita, Marty, and even Peggy when I was a kid. Thanks to Steve half the office thinks my name really IS Mags.

But DJ mDogg was my superfly alterego, the one spinning tunes for all the par-tays.

Tonight I've been compiling music for my sister's wedding to the theme of "Dancing Music." Who knew that Buster Poindexter was the guy who did the song "Hot, Hot, Hot?" Hey wait a second, that's ME! Hands in the air for everyone who remembers the song, "The Warrior" by Scandal. And thanks to Austin Powers, "These Boots Are Made For Walking" is in every gen-x'ers cliff-notes lexicon.

My girl Alicia, Miss Keys that is, has been dominating the night by a fucking landslide. Stomping on Pat Benetar all night long (sorry Pat, love ya to death, but the girl's got S.K.I.L.L.S. on the piano). She really, really, really wants to know "How Come You Don't Call Me?"

She deserves a giganto, shiny, phalic-looking award for that song. Cuz damn.

Spinning the tunes

I know we've played this game before, but in keeping with last night's theme it's time to switch it up a bit. Come on everyone, play along. Don't be scurrrred.

Step 1: Open your mp3 player.
Step 2: Put all of your music on random.
Step 3: List the first ten songs it plays, no matter how embarrassing.

1. Bush - Insect Kin (Jack Dangers/Drum and Bees Mix)
2. Alicia Keys - If I Ain't Got You
3. Buddha Bar - Track #4
4. Poe - 5 and a Half Minute Hallway
5. Collide - Crushed
6. Zero 7 - I Have Seen
7. Mya - Fallen
8. DJ Danger Mouse - Change Clothes
9. Holly McNarland - Do You Get High?
10. Lamb - Angelica

I'm thinking of adding a work version of this later. My list there is quite different than at home... You still won't be seeing 'Cinderella' on it though. Ha ha ha.

Accepting applications for 'Yummy'

Joe thinks he's identified "my type". Little did he know his theory would actually make it round 8 desks or so and get right back to me (thanks Em). And I quote...

**I'm just sayin'...

Apparently I have standards and apparently I'm walking around with them tattooed on my forehead. Or my ass (venturing a guess here, since I'm pretty sure my ass gets far more attention than my forehead). So... if you're a tall, lean, well traveled man in the Minneapolis/St. Paul metro area, feel free to woo me with romantical musings. If you've just acquired a kitten your points will go up.

Joe has a solution - and he's married so he thinks he has some credibility. He's also a man so he thinks a lot of things that are *not* based in reality. He and Steve are taking me to lunch with the Russian mafia tomorrow. Yes folks, I'm a little afraid for my life and I'm not afraid to say it... if I don't blog by tomorrow evening send help in the form of unmarked bills to the Skyway Cafe something 'er other.

Not that going to lunch has anything to do with Joe's solution, but he thinks has one. I'll let you know if he shares.

**(Sorry, have to briefly mention how much I *LOVE* the phrase "I'm just sayin..." Just like I love the phrase 'whatever.' Perfect fillers. Perfectly describe the complexities in my head in just a few precisely beautiful characters. Rolls off the tongue, doesn't it?)

Results are in for today

My frustration level today: <1>-------------------------CAPITAL-VERY---<100>

My creativeness today:
<1>--------------yawn--------------<100>

On the scale of everything looks like a phalic symbol:
<1>----------------------------package-<100>

How much I miss 2003:
<1>-wouldn't-wanna-beya---------------------------<100>

Appetite right now:
<1>-----food-schmood-----------------------<100>

Lame blog entry to pass away the time:
<1>-------------------now---------<100>

How adorable birdies, bunnies, and kittens are:
<1>--------------------------i'm-their-slave---<100>

How much I crush on Raoul Bova:
<1>------------------------yummy----<100>

How disgusting it is that Raphael got anal warts cuz he sat on a frog:
<1>------------------------*shakes-head*----<100>

How much I miss living in Europe:
<1>---------------------------any-sponsors?-<100>

How much I'm down with OPP:
<1>------1993----------------------<100>

Ready-for-bed-meter:
<1>------------------..zzz...----------<100>

I shall call him: Tulippe

One of my favorite things (completely selfish and makes me feel better about myself) is walking home in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

All those suckers get to sit in their stuffy cars while I prance around their stuck-in-traffic suburban booties. Ha ha ha. *Hey look at me, all walking outside in the fresh air, right by the baby bunnies and birdies. What's that? Awwwww, you have to sit in your car for an hour before getting home to a house that's too big for screaming kids and a list of more things to do? Oops, can't talk now, gotta go feed the squirrels* Sometimes I like to look at the drivers and smile. I wonder if they know I'm silently glowing in my little victory?

I am very evil. I'm also very fortunate to be afforded this opportunity.

It's also to my benefit to walk downtown for an hour everyday because the farmer's market is back on for the season! That shiz is wiggedy whack. On the walk home tonight the money in my back pocket was nearly sprouting legs and running full speed at the flower vendors before I got the chance to do it myself. Tulips have GOT to be the most gorgeous spring flower in the history of, er, spring flower. s. We are talking cheap-cheap and the most gorgeous art there is happily on display in my zen room. Ahhhh... nature's art. I love the swooping thing they do. There must be a mathetmatical perfection in that arch cuz it makes me so happy I could just kiss, um, something. I could kiss something. Click on the thumbnails below for the bigger versions.

Yes, I took pictures of my tulips. Hey, that's a cute name for a kitten: Tulip. Or 'Tulippe' if the cat is french.

Stay focused Margaret.

Back to tulips, walking home in 72 degree weather... la la la. *singing melodically* Spriiiinnnnnnng is in the aaaair...

Bookmark this shiz

For when you're having a bad day. Alternatively, if you just like to fuck stuff up:

Wrath Overkill

VHS: the TRUE media!

I'm having an open call for anyone who wants VHS videotapes! Haven't had a VCR in more than 18 months and have decided to officially lose all of the videotapes lined in the closets.

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Some of the treat-a-licious movies included are: Mission Impossible 2, The Thomas Crowne Affair, Center Stage, The Mummy Returns.

Many, many other goodies as well. FREE TO THE FIRST TAKER!!!

Catching up on my letter's today

A few memes this morning.

• Dear Saturday mornings,

  Why do I love thee so? Is it because of your beaming, infectious morning light? Is it because of the cozy bed and 4 pillows? Is it because of the tulips adorning my room? Perhaps the sweet aroma of breakfast food casts a spell on me. And my belly. Oh, the delishioushness of potatoes, meat, eggs, fruit, cinnamon, la la la. I'm just saying', my glorious Saturday mornings... There's nothing like waking up to the tune of Vanessa Daou whilst lying in bed with my laptop and writing. A hint of vanilla in the air and some hot breakfast tea and I think I might actually be a slave 4 u.

  Please, if you would be so kind as to bottle up your recipe for perfection and FedEx that neat little, bow-trimmed perfection this way I would greatly appreciate it (the co-workers could use a little sum'in sum'in in their morning coffee to lighten up, if you know what I mean).

  Waiting anxiously (in my cozy bed) for an answer,
  Love, Margaret



• Dear Keira,

  Oh behalf of Le Secret Story, Part Deux, LLC Inc. we here at Sopheava UneBlog, Inc. are writing to inform you that your payment in the form of one heaping paragraph is beyond expiry.

  Our associates have taken the liberty of attemtping to bribe you in to your civil duties as authoress spe-sial in the form of vast quantities of music, including rather generous portions of, but not limited to, Vanessa Daou, Lamb, and the ever incredible Alicia Keys (II). Additionally, our CEO (Miss Sopheava herself) has personally spoken with and granted you an extension on Le Secret Project.

  That was 3 weeks ago.

  Our patience is thinning, Ms. Mitchell. You have exactly 48 hours to submit at least 2 subsequent paragraphs before the commencement of Goatherder Inundation™ of all shapes, sizes is final. You will be sorry if and when that happens. Thank you in advance for your sincere cooperation, Keira.

  Best Regards,
  Sopheava UneBlog, Inc.



• Dear Stomach,

  I'd like to take this brief opportunity to thank you for your stellar performance yesterday. Let's review your victories, shall we?
  

  • 1:20pm: During an afternoon work outing, consumed 2 pieces of deep fried fish on a behemoth plate of chips (french fries to all the yanks); all glistening in vinegar and salt of course
  
  
  • 1:45pm: Since it's Friday, the brief thought of Dairy Queen ice cream runs through my mind, but only in the form of a mental note to self to be cashed in no sooner then 4:00 CST
  
  
  • 2:00pm: Meeting with Julie - holy crap it's a party for Margaret and her transfer to the IT department, which of course means ICE CREAM CAKE! Yayyyy! Wait a second, I'm full and can't eat another smidgen...
  
  
  • 2:15pm: Luckily disaster was averted when I remembered that ice cream fills in the empty cracks. One giganto piece of ice cream cake later and I'm ready for a nap (or coma, whichever comes first)

  Your effort in yesterday's sequence of events will be rewarded in a trip to the grocery store today to pick out whichever healthy foods you desire. It's springtime, so let's not forget the love had for homemade vegetable lined, quesedilla-type concoctions and fruit mixers.

  You are truly a shining star.

  All my love,
  The rest of Margaret's body

The end of the world

Seen over at his place, who sawer it somewhere else. This has GOT to be the funniest thing I've seen since Teen Girl Squad.

Have a cranberry martini before viewing. The hilariousness of this is amplified by 10.

Um, I'm just guessing, that is.

Click here for "The End of the World"

PS ...fucking kangaroos
PPS ...nothing like a Saturday evening in with le martini and le blog

Ubersheeeek

her: We're a lot like men, our energy that is - the way we handle shit. People in general don't respond well to women who's energy 'flows the wrong way.'
me: No shit. So what does that mean about the kind of guys that are attracted to us?
her: ...That they're gay.
me: ha ha ha
me: No really... what kind of man wants to date a chic that is too independent for her own good?
her: True, true...
her: Oooh, I know! The kind of guy that will giggle say stuff like, "Women will be women" when we throw plates at their head. Everyone just needs to understand that.
me: ROTFLMAO!

One Apple, with a side of 23 inch hardware please

What is this disease I've caught? I am now going to the Apple website at least once a week to drool and lust over the beautifulness that is their computers. And software. And peripherals. Steve, it's all your fault. I've caught this disease from YOU. Bastard. In fact, I don't think I've told you lately but pretty much everything everywhere is your fault, just in case you forgot. Step off man, your iPod is breathing on me.

Apple's are against my religion (at present) for the following reasons:

Which of course means that if I ever have $2000 spare dollars laying around the first thing I'm doing with it is buying a beautiful Apple as a SECOND computer. Le purrrrrr....

Goodnight sweet Apple. You will remain on my bookmark list, though I may bury you under my 'Mixed Berries' folder to muffle the sweet nothings emitting from your every port.

*Editor's note (subconscious manipulation start) to execs (or anyone who will listen) at Apple: Just so you know (this is where I start to beg), this website has very, very high traffic (*cough bullshit cough*) every single day (if you count 50 visitors a day high; or 40, or 30). Somewhere in the range of several thousand (oops, misspelled tens) visitors per day. That said (gosh golly, I'm still talking, and embarrassing myself), you may promptly mail me a fully equipped computing system (any old thing will do), spec'd out at the highest end of your hotsheets (pretty please?) so I may give it my full review (I'll say whatever the hell you want me to say if you send it over; Steve jobs for president? You got it!). All unbiased opinions (must... serve... Apple...) will of course be posted (in one single and forgettable post). Thanks for your time (I'll take off my shirt, would that help?).*

Cheese slut

I am in a fondue coma right now... calm as a hindu cow that has just injested cheese covered apples, cauliflower, carrots, chips, pumpernickel and white bread; blue-cheese topped walnut infused raspberry vinegrette salad; and fondue salmon, beef, teriyaki beef, shrimp, chicken, mushrooms, squash, potatoes, and broccoli.

And then the waiter had the audacity to try to sell us dessert. I'm sorry, are you talking? Everything is muffled and moving in slo-motion.

I digress. I took Shea out tonight for an early birthday dinner to The Melting Pot. Shea had never been there and I, of course, had been looking for a reason to go back for the past 10 months. Tonight was that reason in a burst of spontinaity.

But now... uhhhhhhh.... right now I'm just about ready to slip back in to my coma so I must... stop... writing.

More tomorrow when I can think clearly again. Promise.

T.E.A.S.E.D.™

At my company, there is a disease running rampant amongst IM users (i.e., the entire staff). First, let's give the disease a name... something along the lines of "Toxically Engrossed And Socially Enlarged Disfigurement"™, which we'll of course call T.E.A.S.E.D.™ around Sopheava UneBlog. If you're not hip, if you're not with-it, then you simply do not read my blog. Get with le programme. Jabbing commences in T-5 seconds...

"T.E.A.S.E.D. (Toxically Engrossed And Socially Enlarged Disfigurement)™"

Background:

The origins of this disease are as yet unknown. Speculation produces signs that the first symptoms ran rampant in the San Francisco office of our company circa 2000. This theory can neither be confirmed nor denied by any of the parties involved, mostly for reasons involving a lack of humor.

In 2001 the disease went national when the corporate office split, bi-locating in both San Francisco and the heart of the midwest: Minneapolis. Since then, cases have also been observed and reported in Washington D.C., Chicago, and Australia (reports courtesy of one Ms. Sopheava, Designer Extraordinnarie LLC).

You are susceptible to contracting a case of T.E.A.S.E.D.™ if you work for my company. Additionally, the longer you work with the company the more serious your condition will become. Quickly worsening and spreading until condescending oozes out of your every orifice with such a quickened rate you will need the Story Board to approve treatment in the form of a software upgrade just to run interference. Additionally, psychologists will shove misspelled probes, weak anchor tables, and grammatically incorrect reports/studies down your throat until all you can do is utter nonsensical IM abbreviations mindlessly while your head bops side to side.

Description & Symptoms:

To contract the disease, staff member must have IM client installed on PC (check). Transmission begins when carrier of disease IMs you. Typical conversation goes something like:

This is where the carrier gets his teeth in you, responding with:

Seemingly harmless at first. A teeny little 'np' (for those not down with the lingo, that stands for 'no problem'). Very polite. Ahhhh, how sweet of carrier to be so attentive. Before you know it every single IM conversation you have looks something like:

...fucking smiley faces.

And whoala! YOU are the carrier.

*Please note that the disease gets leaky and spreads to email after a significant, seemingly dormant period.

Treatment:

As yet undetermined, since dedicated testing is just getting underway. Current methods on the table include (all patents pending of course):

Anyone with more information on T.E.A.S.E.D.™ should contact their local chapter for IM Control before all hell breaks loose and smileys run rampant in houses across America :).

Mini vacay

QUOTE OF THE EVENING: (Lewis, my friend's boyfriend coming home to pick up his cat, and promptly exclaiming) "Streusel, why do you smell like vanilla?"

Yes, I'm having an affair with Shea & Lewis's cat Streusel. Well, who could blame me - he's the only thing licking me these days. Ba dum bum.

K folkarinos, I'm outta town for the next few days as of tomorrow. And then again early next week which means I have organized some fantabulous guest bloggers to take over my mouthy duties.

Guest blogger #1 will make an appearance twice this weekend.
Guest blogger #2 will go at it early next week, to the tune of twice.

Figured it was only fair to give all ya'll fair warning first... (and just so you know, they're close friends = this should be interesting...)

I will bring back pictures!!!!!! Have a safe weekend everyone :-)

Once Upon a Time

Once Upon a time there was a girl with some serious OCD. No, we are not talking about some sweet new R&B album. We are talking about Over Cumpulsive Disorder my little babies.
The day started with her waking up thinking about what to write in her friends blog.
The lunch hour included a side of "What the Hell to Write about". Oh, and "how many carbs are in that, by the way?"
Dinner was mainly wine. How could the girl eat at a stressful time like this?
The OCD girl painted at night to calm herself. Only to realize that she would paint a section over and over again because....what else the OCD.
Well in the end the girl sat down, turned on the computer and started to blog.
Hm, I bet you are wondering what happened to her?
She is just fine. The fear of the blog is growing weaker with the touch of each key.
oh thank the lord, I think she is headed for the ice cream now....

ladies sat night

Let me fill you in on a little midwest secret. Ladies nite.
Ladies nite includes 5 women from the ages of 25-70.
We party at a secret underground location.
We consume numerous bottles of white wine.
We tell dirty jokes, laugh at ourselves and eat until we pass out like drunken sailors.
Not just anyone can appear at ladies nite. You must be invited.
There are side effects to this party. Which might include: Stomach pains from laughing too much, stomach pains from eating too much, and of course a headache from drinking too much. Oh, and be warned if you fall alseep on the couch to "rest" pictures will be taken of you.
To all those that wish to join ladies nite, well we are booked up right now.
Ah, too bad for you.
Gotta go find the ladies....

Promise is a promise

First things first...

Will do my duty and give everyone the full details of the weekend's going's-on as soon as I have time to upload all the pictures. But first up I promised nephew Dominic (see pic below) that I would post his superhero! Apparently Army Goo-Man even found his way to Dominic's school for a special appearance. And what with his busy schedule fighting goo-licious crime I'm feelin' rather priviledged he's found time to stop by this little ol' website for a special, one time only appearance.

And without further adieu, adoo, adue, I present Dominc's alter-ego, Army Goo-Man.

Secondly, Dominic's brother Tommy graciously posed for my pictures on the one condition that he be published on my website. What can I say, he wants to be famous! Well that and he has a very convincing manager *cough dad cough *.

Spring Wedding

This weekend I put dirt on my face and played bar card games. All in the name of my sister's wedding of course! If you were one interested in the wedding and similarly akin to wedding photos then this is the place for you! Take a gander in my galleria for a mini album of the day's going's ons.

And let me just start this out by letting the entire universe know that I beat my dad at cribbage. First of all, I play cribbage with my family once every year or two... so needless to say my skills, well, they suck a lot. Big big donkey a lot in fact. Paul, dear brother of mine, was the genius who thought of playing it in the first place. And with a little help from the bartender (let's call him Sharky, k?) I lost miserably (that's what I get for letting a man help me. Heh.). Ask anyone who plays me at games (except Steve, you can't ask him - he lies), I lose and I lose a lot. Let's be clear I'm talking about card games and NOT Nintendo games, comprendieno? Since I'm a los.., I mean, since I lose a lot I figured it was no skin off my neatly exfoliated, smooth skinned back to play the literal big daddy of the family at a game of cribbage. This time I sat far, far from Sharky - and low and behold: I WON! I WON! I WON! I WON! I WON! I won by about 30 points too! Hot damn I rock. Wrapped up in the moment and feelin' fine about my supreme goddess-like power I announced to my father I would tell anyone and everyone who would listen about my victory. I believe his exact words were, "Go on, tell anyone you want. They won't believe you." My answer to that? FINE! I will tell everyone. I will also post it right here in my very permanent blog for everyone on this entire planet to see. And all my peeps on my home planet to see too. *sing along: go me, go me, go go go me*

So, on to the wedding of course! I drove to Madison on Friday after work so we could dive right in to the girlie stuff: facial masks (see gallery for photographic evidence). Poor Kelly, just laying there all helpless like a baby lamb. She couldn't do anything to stop me. Ha ha ha - I'm so evil! Needless to say it worked because she looked absolutely radiant and princess-like.

(As usual, click for full effect. Watch out for beaming beauty coming your way)

The ceremony was held at Wisconsin's incredible state capital in the Assembly parlor. The capital looked JUST like that image too - all the tulips were in bloom.

The reception included dancing, dancing, and um, let me think... yup! MORE DANCING! Kelly and Carlos were salsaing and merengue-ing night away.

(click me too! ooh ooh, pick me!)

That's pretty much the gist of the weekend. Some of you were there, and some of you will be forced to hear about it on the walk to work or during lunch. All others may email me for a profound dissertation on the comprehensive gloriousness of the union of marriage, as witnessed by one Miss Margaret Andrews. Alternatively, you could just say "Hey."

Congratulations Kelly & Carlos!

Today's subject: water

I figure there are two types of people: the ones that take the steamy hot showers and the ones that.... well, that don't. I recently had an epiphany that placed me in the 0.001% of the population that does not take steaming hot, scorching showers.

Steamy hot shower: One in which the showeree, upon exits of the shower can perform the following:

• actually see the fog in the bathroom


• has to wipe mirror with towel to see reflection


• regularly draws art on steamed mirrors before wiping clean


• sets off fire alarm just outside door because of steam leaking out (yup, that's happened)


• breaks the shower 'massager' because stood or laid in tub for so long (this one happened too, but luckily it was at a hotel - can you imagine me trying to explain THAT one to housekeeping?)

And if you're one of those people who just 'stands there' for 90 seconds or longer without movement, your chances of being in this category are quadrupling. If you lay in the tub whilst showering don't think I forgot about you! Especially you. Be warned that just because one may exhibit the previous 2 behaviors does not necessarily classify them as a hot-showerer. In fact, I'm the only person I know who will turn on the shower and lay in it rather than take a bath. The reason? Baths are either too hot or too cold (yes, I'm not entirely dissimilar from Miss Goldilocks who, herself laid in the shower because baths were never to her liking). And if I'm hungover? Fuggadeabawdit. I'll be laying in that tub, letting the shower do what it does best - showering - for a half hour easy.

I shower in the mornings. Always. Every single day. Even if I have to wake up at 4:30 am I will still wake up 15 minutes early so I can shower. There's something very cleansing about it. I know what you're thinking, someone pull on my earlobe, like quick, to let some of that air out of my head. Showers cleansing? Who knew?!

But never in all my years have I ever known someone to take a cooler shower than me. This includes ex-boyfriends, roommates, friends etc. I get out of the shower and the mirror is slightly fogged, maybe around the edges a bit. As if the world needs further proof that I'm 'special.'

After that long and rather painful dissertation on the subject of water I'm wishing all ya'll a safe next few days. I'm off on another trip and will return to my duties here on Thursday.

Miss Keira will be taking over writing patrol in the meantime. Please, show her some steaming hot, foggy shower love, won't you?

Warm, Fuzzy, and Deadly

Hello Sopheava fans! Keira here. Guest blogger for today and Wednesday. Topic of the evening: Stalkers.

I don’t like them. As a matter of fact I really fucking hate these pathetic, deranged idiots. I try my best to avoid them by not participating in events such as: meet and greets, parties of any nature, bar scenes, or any other activity involving social interaction with potential freaks. I like my space. I love my perfectly Zen surroundings right in the comfort of my own home. Unfortunately, I, like many of you, must take a few hours out of the day to go and perform some type of task that essentially brings home the bacon. This is what most of us must do if we want to enjoy the finer things in life, like a home, a few scraps of food, some articles of clothing, a telephone, an ISP, and maybe even some power to go with all that. We learn to live with this fact and we hope that we can find some sort of joy and satisfaction in what we do to bring home our bacon. We do NOT, however, expect to be subjected to stalkers while we are performing this task. Yes, people, THIS is where I encountered my stalker.

Stalker profile:

Age: 37
Height: who knows?
Name: Who fucking cares?
Astrological Sign: Leo (the stalking its prey variety)
Occupation: Ex-professional athlete (again, who really fucking cares about this either? I just happen to know, because the stalker has only told me this about a MILLION FUCKING TIMES!!!)
Income: Plenty (Once again, the stalker has embedded this in my memory in hopes that someday I might actually be impressed enough to fall in love with him and have babies)

Okay, this is how I came across the stalker. I was innocently sitting in my cute little real estate office, handling my b’ness (for 4 hours a day my task is this: "Good morning, Tower Realty. Please hold." After 12PM, I do this: "Good afternoon. Tower Realty. Please hold." My satisfaction in this: When I get to say, "I don’t know. I just answer the phones here. Please hold"). Get the picture? Okay, so I’m innocently doing *that*, and Stalker calls up and says to me "Is this that beautiful Puerto Rican lady who sits at the front desk?" I say to him "Beautiful? Yes. Puerto Rican? No." People, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don’t EVER try to make ethnic guesses or assumptions about people that you don’t know. It makes you look like an ass. Period. Thanks.

Now back to the story. So, Stalker is falling all over himself trying to ask me for a date and I politely tell him that I don’t know him and I don’t remember seeing him in the office. Ever. He says, "Sweetie, I know you must remember me cuz when our eyes met, there was chemistry. I felt it and I think you did too."

Excuse me, but do we not remember when we feel chemistry with a person? Would we not have at least kept some sort of mental image in our head if this "Mate of Our Dreams" walked into our office and had eye sex with us? I think so. And since I don’t recall what Stalker looks like or the moment that we allegedly had, I can say with 100% certainty that there was no chemistry. Freak.

So, Stalker keeps babbling, and I continue to be a snotty little bitch to him, but it turns out he really is a nice lad (that’s the warm, fuzzy side of me talking) and he is in the process of purchasing a $14 million property on the ocean (that’s the materialistic side of me talking), so materialistic bitch and warm fuzzy girl say to him "Listen Stalker, instead of trying to pick me up over the phone at my place of employment, why don’t we discuss this another time?" He says to me, "Can I call you?" "Ummmm- No. How ‘bout I call you?" He says "Well, I think its only right that I call you and properly ask you for a date." Whatever idiot. But the warm, fuzzy Keira overpowered us and I actually agreed to give Stalker my phone number.

Someone please remind me tomorrow to kill that fuzzy bitch. Since this little event, Stalker has called me 4 more times at work (after I told him very firmly not to) and approximately 11 times at home. This is over a two-day time period. Additionally, I told Stalker (today) that I was going to be busy alllllll day and allllll night and 8 of those 11 calls were placed between the hours of 6PM and 9PM tonight. Fucking Stalker. Freak. Deranged Lunatic.

The moral(s) of this story? Stamp out the warm fuzzy before it destroys you first. Don’t be nice. Be honest. Money isn’t everything. It’s almost everything.

Now I must plan how to rid myself of Le Stalker....

Oh!! Tomorrow’s entry may include Stalker photos. Tune in :)

On a lighter note

Mother's Day is approaching, and although I am highly opposed to society’s manipulation of human emotions on certain holidays, I *DO* support all exploitations of Mother's Day. Moms are very important people and whether you realize it or not, mothers are the most sacrificing individuals you will ever meet. Who do they sacrifice for? YOU, silly!! So, pay attention here, kids. I'm going to give you a hand and provide you with all the ammo you need to show your Mom how much you appreciate her this Mother's Day.

Before we begin, let me just say that if your mom SUCKS, then please don't stop reading here. Simply pretend that you are the mom and pick out one or all of these wonderful little treasures just for YOU, and on May 9th, you look right in your mirror and say to yourself, "Honey, I love you sooooooo much." Then give yourself a BIG HUG and a KISS. You deserve it!

Okay, so on to the Mother's Day treasures. The first one here has always been one of my personal favorites. Its great for any occasion, but when you show up with this on Mother's Day, you're sure to be a hit.

This next little treasure came recommended by MSN Shop. Moms LOVE pajamas! Beautiful, comfy, warm and cozy pajamas-. it makes their hearts go pitter-patter, just like your little feet once did all those years ago. That’s why this is a must for your mom. Hey! Wait a second!! Did that price tag just say $185 for some ugly, cotton, Burberry PJ’s??? What the HELL kind of crack are these people on? Let’s try another approach to keeping Mom warm and cozy May 9th. Check out this gorgeous alternative from Victoria’s Secret. Now if your mom isn’t of the sexy, hot mamma variety, try this for a still very pretty, but less sultry look. For either one of these nighttime treats, nothing completes the look quite like this . Throw in a few bottles of this yummy scent and you will surely put your Mom in a state of pure aromatic bliss.

Now, for those of you with moms that never quit "doing," I highly recommend something of this variety at your local day spa. For any of you who grew up with a single mom, this is not even an option. It is a necessity. Let her be pampered by professionals and treated like the Queen that she is.

Now, no Mother’s Day gift is complete without a proper arrangement of beautiful florals. Don’t get her carnations. Don’t even get her roses (unless you are 100% certain that these are her favorite flower). Do NOT pick up a grocery store arrangement. Go to your local exotic florist and take the time to pick a nice vase and the most gorgeous flowers you think Mom has ever seen. Trust me, it will mean EVERYTHING to her.

Finally, for any of you who still have a few bucks to spare, I can guarantee that if you park this in Mom’s garage May 9th, she will never question your love and affection for her ever again.

Happy shopping and Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms in the hizzouse :)

Home... kinda

Many, many multitudes of thanks's's's to my girls Keira and Shea for taking over blogging duty whilst I was gone. I must say, each did an amazing job... definitely stirring up the sopheava dust that's settled here as of late. And just so you know, I didn't not notice the shocking lack of love from all ya'll. I'm pretty sure I told you to give them a love fest.

Just for that blatent show of ignora-love, I'm making each and every one of you look at a picture of a fierce, angry, tailless orange moose (click to experience the full 'offended' experience):

Oh wait, I'm looking rather lovely and happy in that aren't I? Yes, so the trip was delightful and it was a much needed mini vacay (I've decided to drop the last 4 letters of most words for tonight... it's my signa). I will catch up here this weekend when I have more time to settle in. Tonight, however, is about Love Actually *sniffle sniffle* and bed. Speaking of bed...

More to come soon. Ish. So in the meantime drop by the galleria for a few tasty morsels of le trip royale.

Keira's continued thoughts on stalkers... part 2

All over the place this month

nuptuals | more daylight | gravedigger | sisters | cribbage | the end of VHS as we know it | tulips | retrograde kissin' my last month's bootie | shiva | road trip | cutie pajama pants | april showers | baby bunnies | budding trees and plants | giant moose love | water | css | improv | nag champa | melting pot | crest whitening strips | photography

I did it last month, so I guess that means I should do it again this month too... and now, the frequently played songs list:

Vanessa Daou - The Long Tunnel of Wanting You
Alicia Keys - How Come You Don't Call Me?
N.E.R.D. - Don't Worry About It
Melanie C - Why
Lamb - Angelica
Fulanito - Cepillo
Buddha Bar - VI
Alicia Keys - Feeling U. Feeling Me
Britney Spears - Early Mornin'
Santana - Maria Maria
Robert Downey Jr. - River
Juno Reactor - Pistolero

Em says you have to play

From Em, the game for the week. Play along or I'll put a curse on you...