There's a lot of fucking swearing around here

17 March 2004

Let me start out today's rant, er, entry by getting something off my chest (pant pant pant). I'm talking about how everyone is wishing everyone a St. Patrick's Day around here. Customers on the phone, HR reps to candidates, salesmen to executives. It's a lot of love going around the office. Hell, I even posted a picture of a fucking Guinness to be in the mood too. Here's my beef (excuse me while I pull up a couch). Look at the ridiculousness I am subject to.... ah hem:

"Happy St. Patrick's Day! La la la la la. Congratulations on being 1/348th's part Irish! Everyone says they're Irish but I REALLY AM! My great, great, great grandfather is from Ireland. Really. Tonight I'm going to get pissed (that means drunk, in Irish). And I can. Cuz I'm 1/128th's part Irish. Yup."

But am I really out of line asking, ARE ANY OF THESE FUCKING PEOPLE FROM IRELAND? It's just like when Americans travel abroad and people say, "What is your, how you say, hairy-taaage?" And those proud Americans will say, "I'm part German, French, and Greek."

Excuse me? NO YOU'RE NOT! YOU'RE FUCKING AMERICAN! Be proud, stand firm with me people. I feel the glue that's holding us together is softening. Yes, let's celebrate St. Patrick's Day. But for the love of all that is holy, let us celebrate it as Americans!

Whew, I feel better. Anyone offended yet? If so, I'll buy ya a pint to smooth it over.

And in other news, Keira has a blog! All hail the day that Keira got a blog. Woot! I'm not allowed to give out the address yet (she has to protect, um... her daughter, yeah that's it) but I *PROMISE* (doing the cute thing I do now where I batte my eyes -it's a french word, I should know cuz I'm 1/64th's part French-) to pass it along as soon as she gives me permission. Until then, I'm afraid I'll only be allowed to A) talk about her in the third person a lot a lot a lot and B) post snippits as I see fit. And of course I'm expecting everyone to be offended at some point (counting on it rather). Today's excerpt (I feel like Sopheava-Reading-Rainbow!): It's a Big, Tough World.

"Lets rewind back to Monday where everyone and their freaking mother decided that it was perfectly appropriate to start calling me at 8:30 AM. Excuse me -- when the FUCK did I EVER say that I was bright eyed and bushy tailed at 8:30 IN THE FUCKING MORNING?? NEVER! That's right! Never. Jesus Christ! So, here I am, trying to enjoy my week of vacation from the newly acquired part-time job and here's my fucking phone ringing over and over and over again like all of a sudden I'm just going to pop up and say "OH! The phone is ringing. Let me cheerfully answer and see how I can assist this dear friend o'mine." Fucking Idiots! So I take a shower, come out, and there are about a million more phone calls and messages waiting for me. They all go something like this "Keira, we neeeeed you. We're grossly incompetent and cant handle anything with out you. Pleeeeaaaase call back. I'll be holding my breath..."

Let the passing of judgment commence. Hey look, the sun is coming out!

Comments

1. Innnterreeestiiiinng.
2. Like the new layout.
3. Let Kiera know I neeeed her new site address to fawn over.
4. No Irish in this cold blood, but will toast you with Guiness tonight.
5. Keep well

Always

Posted by Ben on March 17, 2004 3:21 PM: