Well bust my buttons. There's 2 hot guys in this freagin' town. I am infamously picky about men. I mean, we are talking 'I-can-tell-by-the-way-he-walks-he's-not-for-me' picky. I am told it's pretty bad (right, so this is the part where I am NOT going to complain about being single then).
So I've been single for what - coming up on a year pretty soon and this is the grand total of guys I have seen that are attractive: 1. Even movie star crushes - most people have them, but apparently I'm not like most people. It's not a stretch for me to say that the guy who played Marcello in Under the Tuscan Sun was pretty hot (Keira, his name is Raoul Bova, just so you can google him 'n all that). Yes he's hot, but he just didn't do it for me in that from-here-to-eternity way.
Today the gods and goddesses smiled down on me.
Yes, the grand total of hot men in this city is now: 2. I think I should tag (both of) them with invisible ink just so I don't forget that they actually exist. I'm also going to describe Markus (I'm calling him that, cuz he looks like a greek warrior - plus I just think it's a sexy name! "Markus" with a 'k'. Hee hee) so there's written proof of my attracted-ness. Let's not forget that this will also document my complete psycho-ness.
Let me begin. Ah hem...
Over 6'2" and under 6'5" (which everyone knows mathematically equals = In Margaret's scope of vision). Well dressed in a dark green, button up shirt (Hubert White in my humble opinion). No wrinkles of course. There were not any wrinkles on his black pants either (I should know, I spent a fair time looking at his backside - ha ha). Beautiful black shoes, perfectly shined and clean. He had messily groomed hair (hair that says, "I showered, put on Margaret's favorite cologne, and then took the time to artfully craft my hair to look messy but it is actually not"). He also looked like he might as well be from Crete (which is of course why he's here in Minneapolis. After I visited Crete a few years ago, he has been hunting me down, searching for the woman of his dreams ever since - who would have thought I saw him in line at the Subway on 2nd?). He also smelled delishious. Well, not so much smelled as looked - I didn't get close enough to actually smell him. Excuse me for a second, I'm drooling on my desk.
And to foster proof of his yummy-mc-yums-a-lot existance I forced Steve to look at him. "Steve, come here quick - THAT guy. YUM!!!" In typical man form, Steve said, "Him? Huh." Ummmmm, YEAH HIM! Hallelujah.
(This would be a much better story if I had actually *MET* him. Oops. What can I say, I was too busy looking instead of thinking. Damnit.)
No whammies no whammies. Mama needs a new pair of shoes!
Comments
Don't tag them with invisible ink. You might lose them. Try that ink that only shows up undera black light, then you can carry a black light around and also see if he's truly a clean freak since mustard stains on his shirt would show up and then you can say "He's not for me."
Puh-lease. If we're gonna go that far I'm gonna nail their asses with paintball ink. THAT way all those other bitches will know to keep their paws OFF!
haw haw
First of all - that lame-ass picture of a greek warrior better NOT be a adequate representation of Markus's hotness, or we are breaking up as a roomming couple :-! I'm vehement on that point.
Second - You are the pickiest Man-hunter I have ever met so we are going to Subway EVERYDAY until you meat (yes meat) him.
Third - I forgot to ask you earlier if you looked for a ring, although you did admit to only pseudo smelling him in that conversation instead of ACTUALLY smelling him, which I think is weak.
Practice makes perfect, and my lady friend is on the prowl (grrrr!)