landlord (lndlôrd)
What a funny funny word. I throw out the term easily, but look at it for a minute. Land. Lord. "Hello, this is my Land. I'm the Lord of it. I am the Lord of this Land. Ho, ye beware. Who doth traverse my Land? I am Lord here." (all in my most baritone voice of course). And what business does a Lord (or in my case a female Lord) have in the urban metropolis that is Minneapolis? Off with you!
What the hell is a 'Lord' anyway?
(this is one of those times where you say a word over and over and over and over again and eventually it begins to lose its meaning, so all you see is a skeleton of characters that might as well represent something to the lost people of Enki = A.K.A. a slow day at work)
Comments
It is a rather peculiar word, isn’t it? By default, these property owning people are bestowed the title of "Lord," when they successfully rent their "Land" and somehow it all seems to go to their head to the point where they find it perfectly acceptable to visit their "Land Dwellers" at any given time on any given day.
I have handled these situations in a couple of different ways, but I must say that my favorite was back in ’99 when I played a little morning game of "Catch the Garbage Bag" with my Lord. That’s right – Catch. This is how you play. A bag of garbage is tossed at the Land Dweller who refuses to walk through the blustering cold of a Wisconsin winter blizzard to immediately take a non-stinking garbage bag to the dumpster. Instead, this dweller has chosen to wait for her boyfriend to stop by to carry out this task for her. As her punishment for being such an indignant dweller, she must catch the bag and then toss it right back at the Lord like a game of Hot Potato. This game can carry on for hours OR it can stop as soon as the indignant dweller threatens her Lord with a BIG FAT assault charge. Hours and hours of fun that game.
I love Land Lords. Such entertaining little playmates. ALL HAIL THE LORDS OF THE LAND.
Oh. My. Goddess. Stop - please, for the love of all that is holy. I am cracking up so hard over here I... I... I can't even WORK!
PS, back then you had a big mouth (that's right, as in, she's mellowed a lot since then).
Dude - do you think of this after we saw our Landlord this morning - wasn't that strange. No worries, though - I double checked. We totally paid our rent.
I cannot believe it's 6:30 and I'm still at work. I have to go home at 7:30 for sure cuz I got practice tonight! This is ridiculous. You know what else is ridiculous? That I'm whining on your Blog. Can I go home yet, Maggs?